Commonly, people suffering in their love life are suffering physically somehow, whether it’s chronic pain, a broken heart (heart problems), breast or lung cancer. They long for that deep connection with someone that seems so elusive that they are in this physical distress. Worse is after divorce, especially a really ugly one, picking up the shattered fragments to put together a loving connected life seems nearly impossible.
People come to me all the time to solve a physical malady but in essence really need to heal their love life. Let’s look at what happens when hopes and dreams die, the happily ever after fades into the distance, and your heart breaks into little fragments.
Yes, trust is gone, bitterness sets in, anger fills your life, you have a filter over your whole being that colors everything in that light. Life isn’t sweet. Your frequency has dropped literally and it sets you up for chronic illness or worse.
In that deep pain, many of you think to yourself that finding love again is going to help. Some are even love junkies, jumping from one relationship to another for that feel good hit that fades out all too quickly. You find that “all men/women are the same.” Is there a solution to this?
I’m not speaking from theory here, I lived every bit of what so many of my clients and people I speak to have gone through or going through.
Instead, it is a process that raises the frequency by eliminating those dark, low energy emotions directed toward the old relationship or your ex-partner.
Listen in as Gwen Lepard and I recount our experiences and how raising our frequencies changed our futures profoundly.
Coming out the other side meant for me reframing what my time with my ex- meant, it also meant falling back in love with him, who he was for me and what he still is as the father of our children and grandfather of our grandchildren. In this we are united.
How does one go from one to the other?
The reframing is one thing, but there’s also a releasing of the ties that bind. When you carry a low energy emotion, like those I mentioned, anger, sorrow, disappointment, hate, resentment, you are still in a relationship with that person. You are unable to move forward. Inviting someone new into your life is virtually impossible because you are still deeply connected to your old partner.
Releasing those energetic ties, also known as cords, is the first step. It is not a one time process. It is much like tending a garden, you have to keep the weeds from growing big and taking over your garden. I wake up and cut cords every morning. As soon as I do, I feel lighter and brighter. It’s a great practice.
The second step energetically is to release the contracts and agreements. This means not only the formal dissolution of a marriage contract, but it is also the emotional dissolution of all other agreements, such as “I agree to let you blame me for things that I didn’t do.” Some of us have that self-punishing thing going and we choose someone that needs to blame others.
And last, a release of any karma, what some people call the agreement we enter life with another spirit or being. It isn’t a system of punishment like some think and karma is voluntary, not dictated by some diffuse entity. You chose to take it on.
A simple reframe of the experience with someone good or bad, could help tremendously. If you ask yourself if you are better off having had that person in your life, even if it was to learn some difficult but important lessons, then your response is gratitude. Why?
Look at it this way, that person, your former partner, did not enter the relationship with you to make you miserable. He or she wanted it to work in the worst way. They wanted the same loving, close, intimate connection that you long for. There are lots of reasons it wasn’t achieved. It’s not necessary to go into that here.
The bottom line is, whatever terrible behavior they are doing or going through, it has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them. Stop taking it personally. Your bad feelings are not hurting anyone but you and blocking the way to having the best love ever.
Release the cords, contracts, agreements and karma to clear the way to being your best happiest self. Then you will be able to freely experience love again. It worked for me. It can work for you.